Journals389
Newest
I am slowly getting back into creating stuff, and want to continue updating my art here.
This includes updating the first pages of Insane Love, so it looks a lot better 
I also want to finish "The Twitterpated Fox" comic I had planned to make for PitiYindee
It hasn't been an easy past few years and as we all know, 2020 is a year that just needs to be buried, but I'm enthusiastic.
I've got a new laptop and soon I will have a new screen tablet, so although it will take some time to get used to, I hope that it will help me bring my ideas more to life <3
Hope you guys will stick around!
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It's been a while hasn't it?
6 min read
I can't remember the last time I really did anything around here, kinda nostalgic to be back.
So what exactly have I been up to for the past year?
Put simply, a LOT.
I honestly don't know where to start so I guess I'll just pick a topic and go from there LOL
I've been watching lots of new anime, reading more manga, and playing new video games, so I have new characters I love and adore! I probably have too many ideas pilled up but when wasn't that ever not a problem? XDDD Also Ships. I have a TON of new ships. Beware because if you thought I was ship crazy before, wait until you see my harbor now <XDDD;;; HOW ABOUT THAT VICTURI HUH? 8D
My art has gotten a little better I think, not by much which is a bit disheartening, but the reason for that is something I will go into in a bit.
As for my personal life...Let's just say it's had a bunch of up and downs.
2017 wasn't the kindest of years, probably just as bad as 2016 for my family and I. Sure we had good moments, but it just seemed like 2016's awful luck just continued to follow us.
And I will not lie, my depression and anxiety was worse then ever. All I could think about was how much of a liability I was to my family and friends, even though I know it's the exact opposite. I basically felt like a freeloader and my art and writing suffered for it.
I barely drew or wrote and I began to shout at myself that I was a lazy idiot that I couldn't produce anything productive for the past 5 years. I had more "moments" if you get my drift, one that almost involved my mom calling 911 on me. That's how bad I became.
And looking for a job? It went as well as everything else that year. When you aren't hired specifically because you mention you are Autistic, it kinda lowers your faith in humanity and yourself. It got to the point where I just didn't care anymore; where I was happy if I got hurt.
It was around that time I knew I needed to get help and not hold ANYTHING back anymore.
I talked with my therapist and let everything out, and I mean EVERYTHING. I couldn't and wouldn't stand for myself feeling the way I did any longer if I wanted to live my life the way I wanted. I had a wonderful talk, got some rather good advice, received changes in my medicine, and I began to truly feel like myself again.
But I knew I still wasn't fully "there". I still wasn't drawing as much as I wanted, even though the desire to was there. It was like every time I sat at my computer, something would click in my brain, and my hand wouldn't draw, instead I would find myself surfing the web instead.
There was still a problem, and that problem was that I wasn't getting out at all. Oh sure I had some friend and family outings, but other then that I had no life other then "Wake up, do computer stuff, maybe do chores, sleep". So yeah, I was pretty much a shut in. <BT;;;;
Then my mom asked me something that took me aback:
"Why don't you and your brother do the Christmas play? You need to get back into doing plays anyway!"
It hit me then and there: My answer was right under my nose.
It had been YEARS since me and my brother participated in a play, around 3 or 4 if I recall correctly, so we both agreed with my mom that we needed to not only participate in the Christmas plays, but get back into participating in play's in general.
And dear God are we so glad and thankful we did. We don't know why we stopped, but we are very happy to be back in the acting business! X...3 The play was amazing and we had such an amazing time; it was A Miracle on 34th Street in case you were wondering. ~^0^~
Also around the time auditions were happening I went to Colossalcon East, and I had a BLAST. I participated in a panel with a friend and participated in the masquerade for the first time ever, so I got a bit of a confidence boost X///3
And to finish the year I saw The Greatest Showman, so I'd say 2017 was 90% bad and 10% good; the 10% starting around September. <|D;;;
So how am I recently? Well, pretty good!
My family is closer then ever, I've made new friends, and I am WAY more productive.
I've planned out more stories, started my YouTube channel (It's lightgirlification by the way X3), blog a lot on tumblr ((Same name as YouTube, in fact it's all I did in 2017 <XD; )), went to Katsucon and WOW it was fun!
I plan to return to Colossalcon East this year and do a TON of stuff, I'm planning a lot for myself, and well...
I got a job.
Yeah, I legitimately will start working.
It will be helping people like me, and honestly I couldn't have asked for a more amazing opportunity <3
And with all that said, I decided to finally come back here and continue where I left off. I won't be as productive as I once was, I don't know when that day will come, but I miss being here.
I was so focused on trying to achieve something, that I needed to remember my roots; where I started out. And that's here.
Most importantly though, I missed all of you guys. (Thank you to those who sent the "Birthday Wishes" by the way! X3)
I know it's been a while, but if you all are still here, I hope you're still willing to stay my friend and I hope we can have fun like always :..)
And with that, I've said all I can think of at the moment <|D;;;;
Thank you all for reading! Here's to being nerdy and crazy!
LOVE YOU ALL!!!!!
Light-girl <3
So what exactly have I been up to for the past year?
Put simply, a LOT.
I honestly don't know where to start so I guess I'll just pick a topic and go from there LOL
I've been watching lots of new anime, reading more manga, and playing new video games, so I have new characters I love and adore! I probably have too many ideas pilled up but when wasn't that ever not a problem? XDDD Also Ships. I have a TON of new ships. Beware because if you thought I was ship crazy before, wait until you see my harbor now <XDDD;;; HOW ABOUT THAT VICTURI HUH? 8D
My art has gotten a little better I think, not by much which is a bit disheartening, but the reason for that is something I will go into in a bit.
As for my personal life...Let's just say it's had a bunch of up and downs.
2017 wasn't the kindest of years, probably just as bad as 2016 for my family and I. Sure we had good moments, but it just seemed like 2016's awful luck just continued to follow us.
And I will not lie, my depression and anxiety was worse then ever. All I could think about was how much of a liability I was to my family and friends, even though I know it's the exact opposite. I basically felt like a freeloader and my art and writing suffered for it.
I barely drew or wrote and I began to shout at myself that I was a lazy idiot that I couldn't produce anything productive for the past 5 years. I had more "moments" if you get my drift, one that almost involved my mom calling 911 on me. That's how bad I became.
And looking for a job? It went as well as everything else that year. When you aren't hired specifically because you mention you are Autistic, it kinda lowers your faith in humanity and yourself. It got to the point where I just didn't care anymore; where I was happy if I got hurt.
It was around that time I knew I needed to get help and not hold ANYTHING back anymore.
I talked with my therapist and let everything out, and I mean EVERYTHING. I couldn't and wouldn't stand for myself feeling the way I did any longer if I wanted to live my life the way I wanted. I had a wonderful talk, got some rather good advice, received changes in my medicine, and I began to truly feel like myself again.
But I knew I still wasn't fully "there". I still wasn't drawing as much as I wanted, even though the desire to was there. It was like every time I sat at my computer, something would click in my brain, and my hand wouldn't draw, instead I would find myself surfing the web instead.
There was still a problem, and that problem was that I wasn't getting out at all. Oh sure I had some friend and family outings, but other then that I had no life other then "Wake up, do computer stuff, maybe do chores, sleep". So yeah, I was pretty much a shut in. <BT;;;;
Then my mom asked me something that took me aback:
"Why don't you and your brother do the Christmas play? You need to get back into doing plays anyway!"
It hit me then and there: My answer was right under my nose.
It had been YEARS since me and my brother participated in a play, around 3 or 4 if I recall correctly, so we both agreed with my mom that we needed to not only participate in the Christmas plays, but get back into participating in play's in general.
And dear God are we so glad and thankful we did. We don't know why we stopped, but we are very happy to be back in the acting business! X...3 The play was amazing and we had such an amazing time; it was A Miracle on 34th Street in case you were wondering. ~^0^~
Also around the time auditions were happening I went to Colossalcon East, and I had a BLAST. I participated in a panel with a friend and participated in the masquerade for the first time ever, so I got a bit of a confidence boost X///3
And to finish the year I saw The Greatest Showman, so I'd say 2017 was 90% bad and 10% good; the 10% starting around September. <|D;;;
So how am I recently? Well, pretty good!
My family is closer then ever, I've made new friends, and I am WAY more productive.
I've planned out more stories, started my YouTube channel (It's lightgirlification by the way X3), blog a lot on tumblr ((Same name as YouTube, in fact it's all I did in 2017 <XD; )), went to Katsucon and WOW it was fun!
I plan to return to Colossalcon East this year and do a TON of stuff, I'm planning a lot for myself, and well...
I got a job.
Yeah, I legitimately will start working.
It will be helping people like me, and honestly I couldn't have asked for a more amazing opportunity <3
And with all that said, I decided to finally come back here and continue where I left off. I won't be as productive as I once was, I don't know when that day will come, but I miss being here.
I was so focused on trying to achieve something, that I needed to remember my roots; where I started out. And that's here.
Most importantly though, I missed all of you guys. (Thank you to those who sent the "Birthday Wishes" by the way! X3)
I know it's been a while, but if you all are still here, I hope you're still willing to stay my friend and I hope we can have fun like always :..)
And with that, I've said all I can think of at the moment <|D;;;;
Thank you all for reading! Here's to being nerdy and crazy!
LOVE YOU ALL!!!!!
Light-girl <3
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2016 Elf Christmas wish list!
6 min read
I thought that this would be fun to. Be interesting to give others stuff anyway lol
<da:thumb id="646384722"/>
Here is the journal!
<da:thumb id="646384722"/>
Here is the journal!
How To Get Started
CHRISTMAS WISHES!
Step 1.Make a post in your dA journal (please include this manual - I won’t grant any wishes, if I see no manual). The post should contain your list of 10 holiday wishes. The wishes can be anything at all, from simple and fandom-related ("I'd love a Snape/Hermione icon that's just for me") to medium ("I wish for _____ on DVD") to really big ("All I want for Christmas is a new car/computer/house/TV.") The important thing is, make sure these wishes are things you really, truly want.
If you wish for real-life things (not fics or icons), make sure you include some sort of contact info in your post, whether it's your address or just your email address where Santa (or one of his elves) could get in touch with you.
Step 2.Surf around your friends list (or friends friends, or just random journals) to see who has posted their list. And now here's the important part:
If you see a wish you can grant, and it's in your heart to do so, make someone's wish come true. Sometimes someone's trash is another's treasure, and if you have a leather jacket you don't want or a gift certificate you won't use--or even know where you could get someone's dream purebred Basset Hound for free--do it.
You needn't spend money on these wishes unless you want to. The point isn't to put people out, it's to provide everyone a chance to be someone else's holiday elf--to spread the joy. Gifts can be made anonymously or not--it's your call.
There are no rules with this project, no guarantees, and no strings attached. Just...wish, and it might come true. Give, and you might receive. And you'll have the joy of knowing you made someone's holiday special.
Step 3.~The List~
1. Art of my (OC)
(She doesn't have the blue streak anymore though. The has a mermaid aqua and blue hair style starting slightly below half way down)
I would love to see her in different fandoms just hanging out lol.
2. Any one of these OTPs of mine: Dazai x Atsushi, Viktor x Yuuri, Vincent x Ada, Rin x Haru, Jackle x Star(Oc)
(F.Y.I: She has a four star charm on a sting at the end of her cap), my OC x Makoto Tachibana and Ryota Mitarai. I love them both so much and I can't choose sue me <|/////D;;;;
3. ANYTHING Yuri!!! On Ice related.
Fan art, merchandise, anything. I love this anime so much and anything would be special for me. <3 (In fact if you decide to draw art and choose this series, may I request my OC hanging out with Yuuri and Yurio? I connect and relate to them so much so maybe a picture where they're teaching me to ice skate or us hanging out playing PS4 games, huddled together seeing as it's winter, drinking hot choco or something? Maybe a little Victor with a heart mouth watching us XDDD) If you draw it on paper please send it to me so I can treasure it forever <3 I'll let you know my address if you decide to contact me.
4. This Makoto Tachibana statue: www.amazon.com/dp/B00KCLXKCM/r…
5. Mastering Manga Power Up by Mark Crilley www.amazon.com/Mastering-Manga…
6. Something for my parents.
They've worked so hard and deserve everything, but I can't give them that. Anything from a card to even actual money is fine. Anything that could brighten up their day. <3
7. Maybe some art by Kylee Henke.
She is one of my art idols, and something from her would be so amazing. I'd love for her to draw either My OC with Makoto and Ryota, like me in the middle and them on the sides and being all sweet, or the video game scenerio with a heart mouth Viktor I mentioned above. Or both! That would REALLY brighten up my day! <3
8. THIS TABLET www.amazon.com/dp/B008HB5K5O/r…
I know it's a tall order, but again this is just my wishlist I'm sharing with you guys, so you can see how big of a dreamer I can be <XDDD;;; I've used a wacom tablet my whole teen life to now, but I admit that my wrist can be mean after a while and I'm forced to take a break. I'd love something like this as it might help me avoid further situations like that.
9. An amazing 2017 year for me, my family, friends, and everyone! We can do it guys! <3<3<3
10. ...I honestly can't think of anything...Maybe Hatsune miku figures? They are pretty and I like prettiful things <XDDD
Merry Christmas! 
(She doesn't have the blue streak anymore though. The has a mermaid aqua and blue hair style starting slightly below half way down) I would love to see her in different fandoms just hanging out lol.
2. Any one of these OTPs of mine: Dazai x Atsushi, Viktor x Yuuri, Vincent x Ada, Rin x Haru, Jackle x Star(Oc)
(F.Y.I: She has a four star charm on a sting at the end of her cap), my OC x Makoto Tachibana and Ryota Mitarai. I love them both so much and I can't choose sue me <|/////D;;;;3. ANYTHING Yuri!!! On Ice related.
Fan art, merchandise, anything. I love this anime so much and anything would be special for me. <3 (In fact if you decide to draw art and choose this series, may I request my OC hanging out with Yuuri and Yurio? I connect and relate to them so much so maybe a picture where they're teaching me to ice skate or us hanging out playing PS4 games, huddled together seeing as it's winter, drinking hot choco or something? Maybe a little Victor with a heart mouth watching us XDDD) If you draw it on paper please send it to me so I can treasure it forever <3 I'll let you know my address if you decide to contact me.
4. This Makoto Tachibana statue: www.amazon.com/dp/B00KCLXKCM/r…
5. Mastering Manga Power Up by Mark Crilley www.amazon.com/Mastering-Manga…
6. Something for my parents.
They've worked so hard and deserve everything, but I can't give them that. Anything from a card to even actual money is fine. Anything that could brighten up their day. <3
7. Maybe some art by Kylee Henke.
She is one of my art idols, and something from her would be so amazing. I'd love for her to draw either My OC with Makoto and Ryota, like me in the middle and them on the sides and being all sweet, or the video game scenerio with a heart mouth Viktor I mentioned above. Or both! That would REALLY brighten up my day! <3
8. THIS TABLET www.amazon.com/dp/B008HB5K5O/r…
I know it's a tall order, but again this is just my wishlist I'm sharing with you guys, so you can see how big of a dreamer I can be <XDDD;;; I've used a wacom tablet my whole teen life to now, but I admit that my wrist can be mean after a while and I'm forced to take a break. I'd love something like this as it might help me avoid further situations like that.
9. An amazing 2017 year for me, my family, friends, and everyone! We can do it guys! <3<3<3
10. ...I honestly can't think of anything...Maybe Hatsune miku figures? They are pretty and I like prettiful things <XDDD
The Elves can reach me here via note or my email: lightgirl94@live.com
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GRADUATED!!!!
1 min read
Yup guys! I finally graduated college after four years of hard work! I'm so happy and proud of myself! Something that I haven't been in a while!
I'm finally able to say, "I did it." and start my dreams of doing everything I want and achieving those things.
I've had a wonderful time at Warren County Community College, of course there were moments, but the good definitely outweighed the bad <3 I plan to take all I've learned and use it to the fullest. Maybe going to a university in a few years.
But for now, I shall take it easy and focus on the now X3
CONGRATS CLASS OF 2016!!! WE DID IT!!! <3 <3 <3 ^0^
Light-girl~
Official graduate of 2016!
I'm finally able to say, "I did it." and start my dreams of doing everything I want and achieving those things.
I've had a wonderful time at Warren County Community College, of course there were moments, but the good definitely outweighed the bad <3 I plan to take all I've learned and use it to the fullest. Maybe going to a university in a few years.
But for now, I shall take it easy and focus on the now X3
CONGRATS CLASS OF 2016!!! WE DID IT!!! <3 <3 <3 ^0^
Light-girl~
Official graduate of 2016!
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Where is I?
3 min read
Hello DA! Sorry I've been away for so long. A LOT of things came up, and I was barely drawing for a while.
Truth be told, this slump I've been in has been going on for at least 2 years. Whether it was my depression or me swimming in self pity, I don't know. Lately my anxiety has been on over drive, even when I have no reason to be nervous or worried. I also have had some family issues as well as issues with friends, which made me have a mental brake down where I literally locked myself in the bathroom and had a panic attack.
I say that nothing is wrong because I don't want people to worry, but in the end it makes them worry even more. I think what the main problem is that I don't want to trouble people with my issues, cause I want to solve it myself. I'd rather help someone else and make them happy and smile then have them worry about me. I want to handle things on my own cause I am old enough to do so. So when these things happen, I tend to hide myself from everything so no one will know that I'm sad or afraid; because I don't want them to think I am weak or a little child. I know that no one thinks that of me, and the ones that do I tend to ignore, but it's like a nagging voice in my mind, saying that my problems are childish and I should be able to handle them on my own. And that can be dangerous for me, as I have attempted a lot of things I'm not proud of.
When someone asks me if something is wrong, I get nervous and upset. Not because they are worried, but because I am showing weakness. I'm showing something I don't want anyone to see; myself at my lowest. Finally I couldn't take it anymore and broke down in front of the one person I care more than anything. My mom. She is my inspiration, and for her to see me like that made me feel guilty. She has her problems and I have mine, and I don't want to add on to them. She sat me down, and told me that I came first. No matter what problems I had or what I say to myself, she is always the first person to shoot those accusations down.
Finally I think I can say that I truly love myself. There will be times where I look at myself in a mirror and think I'm the lowest person on earth, but I know that there are people who love me and care, and I know there is a wonderful future waiting for me. It may have took me forever to see this, but I do now. I finally see me as a person and not as a monster or a deformed girl. I see me as me, and that's all I think anyone I love would want ^//.//^
And now I think I can finally move forward and return here with a positive mind and more art than ever before!
For everyone who stuck around and waited, who gave advice and motivation to a silly girl like me...
Thank you so much
Light-girl~
Truth be told, this slump I've been in has been going on for at least 2 years. Whether it was my depression or me swimming in self pity, I don't know. Lately my anxiety has been on over drive, even when I have no reason to be nervous or worried. I also have had some family issues as well as issues with friends, which made me have a mental brake down where I literally locked myself in the bathroom and had a panic attack.
I say that nothing is wrong because I don't want people to worry, but in the end it makes them worry even more. I think what the main problem is that I don't want to trouble people with my issues, cause I want to solve it myself. I'd rather help someone else and make them happy and smile then have them worry about me. I want to handle things on my own cause I am old enough to do so. So when these things happen, I tend to hide myself from everything so no one will know that I'm sad or afraid; because I don't want them to think I am weak or a little child. I know that no one thinks that of me, and the ones that do I tend to ignore, but it's like a nagging voice in my mind, saying that my problems are childish and I should be able to handle them on my own. And that can be dangerous for me, as I have attempted a lot of things I'm not proud of.
When someone asks me if something is wrong, I get nervous and upset. Not because they are worried, but because I am showing weakness. I'm showing something I don't want anyone to see; myself at my lowest. Finally I couldn't take it anymore and broke down in front of the one person I care more than anything. My mom. She is my inspiration, and for her to see me like that made me feel guilty. She has her problems and I have mine, and I don't want to add on to them. She sat me down, and told me that I came first. No matter what problems I had or what I say to myself, she is always the first person to shoot those accusations down.
Finally I think I can say that I truly love myself. There will be times where I look at myself in a mirror and think I'm the lowest person on earth, but I know that there are people who love me and care, and I know there is a wonderful future waiting for me. It may have took me forever to see this, but I do now. I finally see me as a person and not as a monster or a deformed girl. I see me as me, and that's all I think anyone I love would want ^//.//^
And now I think I can finally move forward and return here with a positive mind and more art than ever before!
For everyone who stuck around and waited, who gave advice and motivation to a silly girl like me...
Thank you so much
Light-girl~
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